MAC for Student

So I have been thinking about getting myself a MAC on my birthday, which is the 16th of next month.  But I guess my birthday gift came a month early.

I was getting all tired at work again.  Working 10 hours a day for 6 days straight does have its moments that gets to you.  So on the last day before I am free for my one and only day off, I decided to go visit the Apple store when I get off.  The more I sat on the idea, the more I looked forward to it and the lighter my chest felt.

You see, I have also been feeling down since Thursday night.  I took a placement exam at college, and I did quite well actually considering it has been two years since I took exams, studied, and did all those student stuff.  I aced the reading and comprehension.  I did fair on math, which was quite depressing because I honestly expected better from myself.  It also did not help that I was holding in my pee because I did not know if we were allowed restroom breaks.  I later found out at the end of the exam that we were allowed breaks!  I also had a headache prior to taking the exam because I just got off a busy day at work.  The guy told me I can take the essay writing test thing I was qualified for so that I can "challenge" a few of the courses and up my placement in English.  As for the math, he said I can study and retake it if I want to place higher than the placement I got.  I honestly did not get any studying done; did I mention I work 10 hours a day?  So after getting the results, I was ready to register for class, but I see how my parents were not in full support of me taking on studying again.  I understand where they are coming from.  Practically speaking it is better I work and save, but it honestly is not all about money for me.  I guess I am just not practical as dad wants me to be, but I do want to achieve something for myself.

I honestly felt my last graduation was rushed since we had to migrate to the states, and I did have a handful of help from my boyfriend and my friend Marchele in getting that diploma.  Also a great deal of understanding from our dean and my college professors who allowed me to take the course online.  Special case, special consideration.  I was quite a head turner when I flew home for graduation; imagine people not seeing me the whole semester and having me graduate with them.  Anyhow, back to the MAC.  My old laptop was still working but it could not get through the high level security of the WiFi here at our place since it is old.  I also got tired of browsing using my cellphone or ipad, because a laptop or PC is just different.  I also got tired of borrowing from my sister.  I gave her the laptop I recently bought from my first black friday here in the US last 2011.

So worst case scenario is I save up and enroll for winter quarter.  If I find an online course I am interested in, I can sign up for the for the fall quarter.  I wanted to enroll CS115 but the schedule will need adjustment form my work schedule and could cut my hours at work, considering if my employers agree to the adjustment.

After getting the MAC I also felt a bit guilty.  I told myself I would not want to spend on anything big until my boyfriend gets here.  But it is just hard for me without a laptop. Just because I am a netizen (haha!).

So basically my last two weeks in bullet form:

• work 
• thought about accepting a position as a cook for free training
• did not push through the cook plan
• applied to two colleges
• got accepted to both colleges
• took placement test for the college I want to go to
• registered for a class
• unregistered for a class
• got a MBPR
• went to Snoqualmie Falls with Family (today)  

Also, it is a good thing I got the MAC yesterday because until September 6 they have this back to school promo.  Students get like $50 or so off the MAC and a gift card for iTunes/ App Store worth $100. :)  Thank you Lord I now have a laptop!

That is basically it.  This is basically a rant of my frustration in getting back to student life and my getting a new laptop haha.

Oh well, my blog my rant. 

Over and out,

Allie

PS:  I am praying for the family of my good, good friend Choods.  Wish I were there for you my friend. 

Bad Day, Good Day

Last night wasn't too good for me so I woke up not feeling it for work. I stretched my time to the latest I could. I was running late as it is and then my car doesn't start! I called dad and he came down from the house to check it out, he went back up to get me change for the bus!

It was my first time riding the bus alone; first time riding it to work too. I text messaged my supervisor about the predicament I was in, and as expected, she was very understanding about it. Riding the bus to work was a fun enough thing doing alone. The bus driver was nice too. 

I got to work and boss just got back from Cali and brought us donuts to work. Everyone at work was very considerate about the car trouble I was having. 

Breakfast at work and time went by quickly. Lunch was late, I took it at 3:32pm. It was a pretty easy day. Thank you Jesus. Just when I thought it was a bad day, the day proved me wrong. 

Sister picked me up and we went to pick up dad as well. We came home to a yummy home cooked meal by our beloved mother. 

I also already excused myself from working late at my other job and told my boss I just might be too tired to perform the job well. Her reply was good, thanking me for my honesty. Also, my other boss called me over dinner, said she would be bringing me food tomorrow. :) 

Now it's just me, music, and my current read: Walking Disaster by Jamie McGuire. I sooo loved the first book, Beautiful Disaster, that I immediately grabbed the second book after finishing the first one. Good thing the book hold came in just in time. :) 

Well, off to reading again before I sleep. 

Good night.

Allie.

I am tired of hearing the same and old played conversation over and over again. For years I have been drowning it out but now it is harder. I am not only fighting the loud banters but the loneliness and dettachment that comes with moving to a different country. 

How can you be so selfish as to keep on going about how you feel and what you want? Notice those who are silent as they can be likened to a quite volcano, heating up and at any moment might just erupt. I am very, very close to my boiling point. I just needed to spill it out a bit over here.

I am tired of the same old shit you guys do. If you are tired of something or not happy about something then do your very best to change it and make it better! Focus on the good things and appreciate each other instead of magnifying the bad and repeating the wrong that was done! I am crazy tired of this shit so much so that it has me cussing when I normally do not go on typing or saying out loud profanities. Life here is hard enough, I do not need your fucking attitudes weighing me down even more. I feel like Iam drowning already as it is, and you go on about how things are like this and like that, well you were the ones who decided to move here right?! Even if you say it is for our future, well suck it up and face it like the grown ups you are supposed to be! I am such in a fucking dipshit mood I cannot even!!!

Shit. Fuck. 

Contentment, Where Are You?

Before, I always thought being content isn't as good as people make it sound like. Contented people stay where they are, they lack ambition, they are stuck and do not make something better out of their lives (generally speaking). 

When I landed my first job in Seattle, at Taco Bell, I refused to be contented. I cannot do Taco Bell my whole life. It was frustrating to think I went to school for so long and only to land a job at Taco Bell. Maybe it hit my ego or whatever (I definitely am sure it hit my pride) but I really wanted out of there. I went home and looked for a job and found one. I stayed longer than intended. Soon enough I left to fly back here at Washington again. The job I landed there did not do me good either. Yes, I was not contented.

I got back here and landed a job at a testing center. Working there, makes me feel like "please, kill me now". I cannot wait to quit, but I can't just yet because they are already short of people as it is. I am totally unhappy there that I only gave them my Saturdays and my Fridays I took and gave to Taco Bell, the job I left about a year ago because I refused to be stuck there. This time is different though. I work there not because I have to, thankfully I have a full time concierge job that I do not hate to answer my financial needs. Working back at Taco Bell is more for a past time now, and social life I guess? I did gain friends during my time there. 

Second Friday back at Taco Bell was stressful because of the inspection and the presence of the big boss, but other than that, time flew and before I knew it I am home relaxing. I dread the long and slow day at the testing center tomorrow. Sure they pay more, but I am blessed that now I do not have the need for it anymore. 

I have strayed quite far from the topic at hand: contentment. Lol. I tend to do that a lot, get sidetracked. Anyhow, I think it is sad that I do not find contentment in any of the three jobs I have now. I am thankful though that I do not hate my full time job and I can quit the job I hate at anytime. But this being not content also tells me that I am ambitious, I know I can do more. I guess that is a good thing? I just pray the Lord will grant my perseverance and strength to follow through my being ambitious. 

Tired Feet, Aching Back, and Sleepy Eyes, 

Allie

Homesick

Sometimes it is hard to keep my sanity in a place so far away and so different from home.  I try to cope and adjust, but sometimes I fall back and crumble.  Tears flow, chest burns, and I know in myself, that I am not home. 

I am thankful I am with family, they pull me back to sanity when I feel like I am losing it.  What I would not give to be home, making a life there and just being. 

Update Post

Long time no update yes?  Aside from having no space before (when we used to still live at our uncle's place), there was barely time.  Now that I have the space (sort of) because we moved already (praise Jesus!), I don't have the laptop and barely have time for it.

So my laptop I gave to my sister before I went back home to the Philippines after Christmas holidays, and the one I have been using ever since was my old Acer laptop which resurrected from retirement.  My old 2006 Acer lappy cannot connect to the connection setting at our new place because it has been left behind from technology.  I am seriously considering saving up for a Mac, but that is really not a priority right now.  It has actually been a while since I have been online via laptop, I have been using my iPad mini and iPhone for all that.  You can imagine it isn't as easy typing down my rant with those keypads.

So just a quick update:

• I work at Prometric Testing Center as a Test Center Administrator, hire date: April 17, 2013.  I do not like the job, I actually hate it and I am working up the nerve to tell my supervisor that I want to quit. 
• I work at Aegis Living as a Concierge, hire date: June 24, 2013.  The job is way better than the TCA job and I am thankful for the schedule, 4 10-hour days. 
• I just very recently decided to go back and work for Taco Bell, hire date: July 26, 2013.  Told you it was very recent.  1 day a week, 10 hours.  Just for the fun of it.  I miss the labor, the people I used to work with.  They pay is low compared to the TCA job, but I'll take it over that.  It isn't always about the money. :) 

• I have started to process my petition for my boyfriend's fiance visa, mid June.  Now, the waiting game. 
• Did I mention we moved?  Our own small place, but at least we get the space and privacy.  I cannot complain. 
• I have become more financially independent.  I have to start, I am already 23 years old for crying out loud! 

So that is the quick update in bullet form.  Today I started to put acrylic oil on canvass again.  The outcome wasn't pleasing, but I keep in mind I can only get better by practice. :)

I am still seriously thinking about going back to school, but I don't know what course to take yet and I don't think I have saved enough to be able to comfortably provide for myself and my education. HA! Hearing myself talk so mature makes me want to puke a bit.  I honestly still have to remind myself I am not longer a teenager.

I have been reading again too!  The library here is awesome.  I have been going to the Lynnwood library, borrowing books and scanning / printing stuff for FREE!  Oh boy, this is now probably long enough?  Well, I have  a lot more to rant about and hopefully I will have more time for that in the coming days!  Did I mention I really want to quit the TCA job? :p YES!

from the upper apartment,

J a.k.a. Allie

  

Of Saturdays and Yoga

Today I woke up early, with only 5 hours of sleep. Actually, I was already rushing because I came home an hour later from work after getting carried away talking to a co-worker and I failed to prepare my things before I went to sleep.

After meeting up with my friend (my good friend's ex-girlfriend who became a good friend of mine as well, weirdly but pleasantly enough after their break-up) Alynah for a quick catching up over lunch last Tuesday, I told her about my interest in trying out Yoga classes. It was a good timing that Surya Nanda Yoga was having intensive workouts this weekend. An energy exchange of 500php/ session; 1,000php/ 2 session; 1,800php/ 4 sessions or the whole weekend workshop. We decided to go with the 500php, Saturday morning session: Fun Flow Practice with Mrs. Allen Maitri Enrique. Sidenote: Maitri sounds like a yoga/ yogi name or something. We chose that since schedule since I had to work 3-12 midnight today.

from off their FB page

It was a good and very (very) challenging yoga practice. It was not helping me concentrate either when someone is going around the room taking random picture which sure enough is now posted up on Facebook.

We ran a bit late because I couldn't find my shorts, so I had to wear this other one. I picked Alynah up at JY Square and off we went to Surya Nanda Yoga for the first time. It was a bit weird, different from the usual Citigym environment that I was used to (after a month of membership). It wasn't air-conditioned (although I get that since we were going to sweat), windows were open, and you could heere the busy street outside. Although the music did help muffle that out, and it was a Saturday so the streets weren't as busy. We practiced at the 2nd floor of West Gorordo Hotel, just the next building (if not the same) to where their studio actually is.

I did not participate as much as I would have during the yoga sessions I joined in Citigym because this was intensive yoga and I am still a beginner. First few minutes into the session, sweats immediately broke out. It was good sweating. But later in the session I dried up. The yoga poses and exercises just wasn't right for my lazy body and my lack-of-sleep state. I didn't feel I was able to maximize the 500php I paid for, but I did not regret going either. It was nice going with Alynah. During the cooling down or Savasana, I think I might have felt asleep, good thing I hear the instructor's voice and snapped back to reality.

We asked to see their studio after the session and we entered the side of the building (I'm not sure if it was a separate building) and we had to walk to the 5th floor since the lift wasn't working. The studio was really small and the girl said they could hold up to 20 students if they really maximized the space. They had only one really small dressing area. Currently the charge 1,000php for 10 days sessions and 1,500 for 10 night sessions, consumable within a month. They had other packages as well but my memory fails my now. Within the next month they'll be moving to a new and bigger space, and so as follows the increase in their prices.

Alynah and I drove to Waterfront so she could go check out Citigym. I love that they still have the Youth package, 1,500php/month for those under 23 years old. This is the most affordable deal I've ever come across and Alynah seemed pretty sold to the environment, facility, the variety in classes, and the 24/7 gym access; not to mention the free individual locker use, shower, sauna, and steam room. Their yoga classes are fewer than last month's schedule though, hopefully that'll change next month.

I would like to try yoga hopping. And I really hope I'll keep up with the yoga. I hope I get the poses and pretty soon do some breakdance moves (lol). 

We drove the Lahug because I wanted to inquire on French lessons, they are quite pricey and their next class starts on March and ends on May. I plan to leave on April, so maybe I won't be taking that class. I drove Alynah home and the girl talk and company was much appreciated.

Came and logged in to work early. I had a lovely lunch with boyfriend at Tokyo Joe's (2nd time this week). And boyfriend accompanied me to work. We have KFC take outs for dinner. I am sitting here and I just finished a movie and a series, while boyfriend was doing work and now is playing his online game. The band from the restaurant next door is playing now and I guess my Saturday isn't as bad, even if I had to work.

Thank you boyfriend! :)

And as always, Lord, may Your will be done.

Period

I was one who thought that all these "hormones" and "period" excuse was all rubbish. I never really did "crave" anything before during my period, not crave anything out of the usual anyways. But I have lately come to realize that such irrational emotions tend to surface during my time of the month. 

I first noticed it during third year college I believe, or maybe second? I drove to Jollibee from school because I HAD TO have peach mango pie! I ended up eating about 5 zert pies all by myself. 

I love to eat sweets (even more) on my days of the month.

I had lunch earlier with my friend Alynah, and we talked about everything and anything in our lives. She mentioned there was scientific basis for the hormones acting all crazy or whatever during our time of the month. She said we tend to feel hot and easily irritated. She's a nurse by the way.

Since I just recently acknowledged such phenomenon, looking back, I salute my boyfriend for putting up with me during my time of the month. Just last Saturday I made a huge deal of him not showing up at the house, even if he did say he'd be there AFTER the event he went to. And because I could not wait I drove around Cebu city, not knowing exactly where the event was. I wanted to go out, go somewhere, but I really had nowhere to go to. I was all hot and furious on the phone, but boyfriend was calm and understanding. When we finally met up, I was all b*tchy (I admit *eye roll*) and irrational, not thinking straight at all, but he was calm and he did not stoop down to my mood. He even got me a shirt! Just like sweet boyfriends would do when attending an event or concert to remind you that they were thinking of you! We went to my house and walked to the Chowking near my place and ate. Despite my being all bad mood and bad vibes, he stayed with me and fed me. He managed to calm me down and eventually made me smile. 

I might have overlooked this part of our relationship before, me being all hot-headed and him being all calm and bringing me to my place of inner peace. My boyfriend, my zen. Now I fully acknowledge it and dedicate this blog post to it, to remind me of how lucky I am to have you- my Elwin. :) 

Side note: Thanks for accompanying me to my salon sessions (mani, pedi, haircut, and etc.).

2013

And sometimes I myself wonder how I am so crazy in love with you, this is only one of the many million reasons why. :)

To my ever-dearest loving boyfriend who puts up with me when I'm hell to be with,

  I LOVE YOU

to the moon and back times infinity and beyond.

Sinulog 2013

I remember my first Sinulog experience from years ago: hot scorching heat from the sun, streets packed with people, handmade native farmer's hat, car-free roads, and the Sinulog beat. First year college, CWTS requirement to stand as human barricade to keep the people off the Sinulog parade. It was my first time out there since for the past 15 or so years, we've always spent it indoors. My family wasn't one for getting it in with the crowd (on All Soul's day, we usually visit our departed days before or days after, and we've never done the whole overnight at the cemetery thing). I remember being there with my friend Mara and my back then, best friend of a guy Elwin; months after he'd be my boyfriend. 

Every Sinulog since then, I have spent hand-in-hand with my boyfriend. Both of us out in the streets and sticking together, walking through the crowd. I'd be the one who packed the bag and he'd be the one to carry it. He was also in-charge of hydrating us. There was one Sinulog I almost fainted. The flow of people was cut-off because they suddenly closed off a passage way by Fuente area. People were pushing back and forth and the air was hot and I was dizzy, my boyfriend told me to look up and breathe and took me out of the crowd. I believe I was hyperventilating and tearing up, probably all rec in the face. Sinulog festivities reminds me of how this boy can take care of me. :) He usually is in-charge of where we go, how we get there, what route to take, and he'd ask me what I want but I just enjoy watching him taking charge. :) My man.

I wasn't able to spend last year's Sinulog with him because I was in the States. And this year was different from the usual ones we've had. We usually get out early, before lunch and catch a glimpse of the parade, but this time we spent the whole morning, lunch, and after lunch at their place. My boy wasn't feeling it and was tired. He wasn't up for the Sinulog experience. He was also worried about me since I just got my period and that always means menstrual cramps and aching joints. But I was still up for it. So we left at 4pm, stopped by our old school and ate at Silogan ni Gian. Took another Jeepney ride to Ayala mall and we decided to go in. When we were inside I felt like I really needed to go to the restroom or else I might stain my shorts. So we went from restroom to restroom and  find all of them with long lines. At the basement 2, still long lines, I resulted to going in at David's salon. I asked if they had a restroom for their clients and the lady said yes, so I signed myself up for a haircut and went to the restroom. 

After years of saying I'd try to wear my hair short, I never really got around it. I frankly love long hairs but a part of me always wondered how it was wearing it short. The last time I had it really short, as far as I remember, was back in kindergarten.

After the impulse haircut, we went up and grabbed some potato corner. Boyfriend bought 3 bottles of water, which I thought was too much until later I'd be proven wrong. We bumped into Paul and Adine too. After that we made our way through the thick crowd in the mall to the streets by Marriot and City Sports, our usual spot. :) 

Watching the fireworks display was also somewhat a tradition with boyfriend. The fireworks display was quite a recent tradition itself on my first Sinulog. This year I heard Ayala spent 3 million pesos for the fireworks display which lasted for about seven minutes or so.

Sinulog 2013 Fireworks display by Ayala

Just the moon that night.

Some people would think that going through all the walking, all that crowd, and all the waiting to get a good spot at the fireworks display was not worth it, well it is always well worth it to me especially with my boyfriend by my side. :)  Watching the fireworks display this year made me feel like the stars were so close and within reach, and reminded me that there sure are a lot of amazing things in this world. And I look beside me, and get the most amazing feeling of all- love. :) And with a smile I give my boyfriend a kiss on the cheek. 

Not going into the whole religious aspect of the Sinulog, but for the festivities and "personal tradition" aspects of it, that was Sinulog 2013 for me. :) 

And oh, we were walking from the mall to my 7-11 to my house supposedly but boyfriend's cousin spotted us at the old SSS building and we decided to tag along with them to walk to IT park. On the walk a guy in the motorcycle scared me, I thought he was a snatcher (apparently stuck in traffic) but it was Eduard, an old friend. 

Boyfriend and I had dinner at Shakey's bus place on the grass. And after that we caught up with his cousin and his cousin's friends where they had their drinking session. But my boyfriend's new year's resolution, which I love and he's kept so far as the 21 days are concerned, is to not drink soft drinks and beer for this year. He said it was for me, and my heart smiled. :)

We ended up calling it a night at around 12 midnight. With a Starbucks frapp in hand, we hailed for a cab along with all the others who were hailing one as well.

//And oh, usually we get Sinulog shirts togther, but this time we didn't and I was wearing my Sonic Boom shirt which boyfriend got for me from the event he went to the night before, how sweet!

2013

Well it's the start of another year and I'm slacking off my blogging while I am here in the US. *excuses*

Downloaded this for free, although the reviews weren't very encouraging. I'm still hoping it will work for me because otherwise I might result to actually purchasing this other app. And I hate spending. I would probably do so more loosely if I am earning dollars for myself.

Well, I am hoping I can keep up the blogging for this year. I will start with back posting blog entries when I get back to Cebu. Right now, my mind is yet again entertaining the idea of going back to Tumblr just because it has a well-supported app compared to blogger and Wordpress. (Or so I feel.) I hate how I keep going back and forth with these blog sites, why can't I just stay put?!

Cheers to a good year ahead! :)

// I see how images are all the way at the bottom and I can't seem to move them to any other part of the post. Minor problem there for a free app.i can easily edit that when I get on a computer (or so I hope). So far so good for this app, but I hope they get the whole thing with the image a fix. :) Might drop them a line to find a fix. :D Or am I going about this app the wrong way? But I doubt that, I would like to believe I am "techy-er" than your average Jane Doe. ;)

Seoul, Incheon

Hello from Seoul, Incheon airport. I just arrived here this morning at about a little past 6am in the morning. From that time up to now (11:49am), I have already eaten, went online, talked to mom, dad, and boyfriend, taken a very,very short nap (thanks to that old annoying lady on the phone with her loud self while people around the Rest & Relaxation lounge were trying to sleep), brushed my teeth, and showered. Yes, hooray to free shower! I do not know for how long they have had free shower but I am sure before there was a fee. The price was placed on the door, and now I didn't see any price, I just thought of going in to ask for the price, and as it turns out- shower is free! :) You get a free soap and sachet of shampoo as well. Also, free use of their very small towel.

Leaving my boyfriend behind is something I will never get used to. It is always hard. But thank heavens this time it will only be for a month (or will it? haha). Thank you boyfriend for always seeing me in up to the check-in area by securing a pass, and for doing all the heavy lifting I wouldn't be able to do on my own. I love you and I cannot wait to finally leave the airport WITH YOU!

I'm basically just chilling here waiting for my phone to charge via USB, and it is taking so slow to charge this way. What I do not like about being in this airport is their power sockets do not agree with my plugs. :( But aside from that, I'd rather be stuck in this very airport for 12 hours over any other airports. Free Rest & Relaxation lounge access, free internet/WiFi acess and there are even laptops you can use, free shower, good food, and it's like a mall in here. As you wait for your flight you can just stroll. And if all else fails, go online and chat with friends. :) Only 1 hour time difference from the Philippines.

12PM. About 6 more hours of waiting to go. :D

Of Boxing and Religion

So last Sunday, while I was sound asleep, Manny Pacquiao, the Philippine boxing pride, lost the fight on the 6th round with a knock out. Bummer. 

You win some, you lose some. Can't win them all. People were with him during his victory, they should be with him as well in this loss. At least he admitted that he was overconfident (so I heard). 

I woke up to all this ruckus on Facebook about the fight. A lot of them were down. Even a few pathetic statuses blaming Manny's change of religion.  

Earlier today, boyfriend showed me a video of Aling Dionisia (Manny's mom) going about "Wanted Pastore Louie" and how it is this Pastor's fault Manny lost. That video really pissed me off. It was annoying to see her broadcast her idiosyncratic ranting to thousands and thousands of viewers. She should be careful what she says, she might just start a fight. 

I posted on Facebook: "Manny lost diay? Tsk. Meanwhile, I was sound asleep while all this was going on." and my cousin mentioned: "and a lot of people are blaming Religion of his failure." I again replied, "and so i read, but religion is but man made haha. Your intimacy in the relationship with Jesus is between you and Him, and no one has the right to judge that. :)". He also replied with, "well I have read too, something about rosary and Mama Mary thing, kay he wasn't doing the sign of the cross thing kay he shifted his faith something like that... did I choose the right word? shifted hahaha". And in comes my over religious grandmother's sister with a comment: "Ah! Ah!!!!!" I mean seriously, what does that even mean? Knowing her, it must be a negative reaction to my comment. And in an attempt to taunt her, "kita ka sa interview ni dionisia Marco Antonio Ang Barcelo? haha "wanted pastor luoie" (or unsa ba toh?) haha gamayag utok." ("did you see the interview of Dionisia? haha "wanted pastor luoie" (or whatever?) haha. She has a small brain.") Or I meant to say how narrow minded she was, but small brain describes her just fine as well, especially in our dialect. I just now, added in a link to the video on the thread of comments and expressing my disgust. 

This reminds me about my post on Facebook about wanting to have a Tattoo, I should dig it up and blog it too, maybe tomorrow. Anyways, narrow minded, close minded people, who think they are better than others really just annoys me. Annoys me so much, almost to the bones really. And these will include a few of my overly religious relatives, sadly.

Justin Beiber posting up stupid stuff on his Instagram didn't help the Filipino pride either. I get that he has his right to express his opinions and "joke", but he should really be careful with his status and all. I hope all his Filipino fans turn their backs on him, even just for a short while to teach him a lesson. 

Point of my rant is, why in the world are they blaming religion? It could be Manny didn't have the same drive to win and that it isn't as important to him anymore as before. I mean before when he was Catholic and seen as sort of religious, he was still gambling and cheating on his wife with all these different women with all his money. Maybe now that he's a changed man he doesn't feel the need to win all the time, maybe he doesn't think as worldly as he did, and maybe he spent more time reading the bible and preaching than practicing and preparing for boxing. See what I did there? I assumed. Not even assumed, I just put out possible scenarios out there, which are more likely reasons than other people's reasons that he didn't make the sign of the cross or pray the rosary. Seriously. I have nothing against people who pray the rosary and people with other beliefs, but it just annoys me when people talk trash on other people's beliefs and religion. I mean respect begets respect. Frustrates me how some people think. I know we all don't think alike, we are all different, but this is just something that frustrates me: people who are close minded and people who force their beliefs and religion on other people. And those who look down on people who don't see the same way they do. Annoying really!

Of Sick Leaves

What I love about my blog is how only my boyfriend and a friend or two knows where to find it. And most people assume I no longer update it, so no one really bothers checking it out. So I am free to write about my life and opinions as I please.

Today my boyfriend woke up 30 minutes before the time he should be at work. It's a Monday, and more so today than other weekdays, it is harder to go to work. So I mentioned "take a sick leave", and he seizes the moment. He played basketball the night before, and so uses the excuse that he has muscle ache or muscle spasm (somewhere along those lines of excuse). Being as this was my one and only day of before I leave, errands and bonding time it is! 

I didn't have to go to work until 11PM and the 3PM meeting, I checked, wasn't compulsory. Why ruin my last day off with a meeting right? So much to do! I asked for a leave on Thursday, day before my flight, I requested last week but still no reply.

At boyfriend's house, after watching my choice of "horror" (yes, in quotes because they say it wasn't scary, although it was a bit scary for me) movie, a Filipino film "The Healing", we had lunch and got ready to head out. 

We stopped by for Starbucks at Oakridge, because I needed 4 more stickers (2 more to go) until I get my sister her planner. And plus I thought it had been a while since we both had Starbucks together. After our early afternoon and for-the-sake-of-stickers coffee fix, we continued down the road to JCentre!

Starbucks Christmas drinks 

and spinning the wheel after groceries.

Not a lot of people easily go to JCentre, especially people who work at IT park, so it was safe to stroll there. We first did errands at the grocery and loaded the cart with canned goods and a few dried mango packs. After that we bought tickets to The Rise of the Guardians and used the free game tickets that came with the movie tickets on the massage chairs. We got a good 4-minute beating on those massage chairs. After that we ordered Giga Fries (barbeque and sour cream) Potatoe Corner. Because one does not watch a movie without a Potatoe Corner at hand! We got drinks from the groceries as well because they are cheaper there, or so we always assume. The movie was great and it would have been nice if we brought the kids (boyfriend's younger siblings) but they were busy with projects. And plus, it is also nice to go out with just me and him. More errands after the movie, drugs this time. All those medicines and stuff. 

Before heading to the car, we stopped by an accessory stall. Boyfriend bought an earring (a pair but he only uses one), and I was eyeing a ring. Boyfriend bought for me the ring and I bought for myself earrings too. It's nothing expensive, just something fancy, sparkly, and shows that "my boyfriend bought me something" and that makes me smile. :) I will always remember how special he makes me feel, each time I look at it sparkle on my hand. :">

We headed to his house and watched a movie again (we are such couch potatoes, almost) Premium Rush. After that, a few episodes of 2 Broke Girls. Dinner time was accompanied with teleserye. After the late dinner and just hanging around, I had to get going to work.

I haven't yet left but I am already missing my boyfriend so badly. I should be gong only for a month, and God-willing I will be back by mid January. 

I bought fries and Starbucks for work (now only one more sticker to go!) and later I have food prepared again by my boyfriend's loving mother. :)

I just wanted to blog this because I want to read back on this on day, reliving the feeling of how very nice it is just to be with my boyfriend whether we're doing errands, movies, or just being home buddies. 

The Simple Things

I am not sure if I already have a post up with that title, but it is a common title and very relevant to me. I am a simple person really, who appreciates simple things.

So a couple of days ago I was sick and I whined to my boyfriend about it. He of course kept apologizing about how he was so busy with work that he could hardly find the time to reply to my messages. I understood him of course, since at the end of the week was the release of their project. Upset as I was, not really at him but at the situation, I went to sleep. I woke up to no message and I text messaged him, letting him know I was awake. He replied with a short and to the point message: "OT". Great, now he's on overtime with work, yet again. I messaged him telling him I hope I'd catch him. I planned on coming to work early so I could maybe catch him for a quick chat or a bite to eat. It really sucks having opposite work schedules with him. He messaged me back not to go out of the house and that he was on his way to see me. I asked him why and he replied a short, sweet, and honest answer: "Mis u man." My boyfriend  :"> So I was all giddy and I tried to cook for him this new corned beef we have not tried yet, and it was actually part of my errand list. If I had to buy 2 dozens of it to bring to the US, it must be that good. Boyfriend arrived with a box full of KFC chicken. My sweet boy. Although my aunt and I burned the onions we sauteed for the corned beef, I am happy to report that my boyfriend still loved it. And I love him.

Earlier today also before my shift at work, boyfriend and I were watching a movie at his place. When I was about to leave for work, he handed me a plastic with 2 containers. Apparently, his mother, on her own, decided to cook me my lunch for work. A really sweet gesture I will look back to even years from now and still appreciate just as much. It is a very nice feeling when your boyfriend's family accepts you and loves you, and you loving them back in return. I just am blessed that my boyfriend and his family both love me, and I love them too.

In a week I'll be seeing my family, finally after 6 months. I cannot wait to give them my hugs. And I cannot wait to snuggle up on our babies Miggy and Phoebe. It will be hard though when I'll have to leave again, because you can't reason or explain to dogs. I wish I could make them understand.

Today is a Sunday and the sun is shining down on my face right now. It will be church in 4 hours but I'm not sure I'll be able to attend. I pulled through the whole shift alone and could not catch a nap like I usually do before church. It will be such a shame if I went and be all sleepy. I just kept watching 2 Broke Girls to pull me through and keep me awake. I'm really sleepy now and cannot wait to go snuggle up in my bed. I have a long and busy week ahead full of errands, Jesus please see me through.

                                                                               

                                                                                                                                                                                         

The Sun is Up.

You Are God Alone

Just a song appreciating God and the way He is. We sang this before we began bible study last week and again at church last Sunday. 

"You are not a god in need of anything we can give."

Basketball

My boyfriend plays basketball and I have been going to his games with friends or school tournaments every time I am able to. Sometimes I would stay after class just to watch him practice with his teammates, most of whom are my friends as well. 

I went to his game last Sunday, it was scheduled at 8PM but started earlier. Their team was not prepared, some of them were still on their way. For the first quarter it was on and off due to the rain. But even before the game started, my boyfriend and I knew the other team would win. We know this because they have a player on the other team who was our school mate before, and we know how he, along with his current team, take basketball seriously. As for my boyfriend and his team, some of them just met at the practice a few days earlier, and those who were catching up, they just met on that day during the game. I could imagine how awkward it would be playing and teaming up with people you just met. The game finished and I do not remember the score but I remember it was a huge difference between both scores. 

I do not know with guys, but for me, I enjoyed the game. I especially liked how all of them got to play. Maybe I am just one of those "team spirit" kind of person. 

I did not like how one of their teammates left somewhere in the second quarter. He just left with no word to his teammates. I also did not like how his mom was also on trash talking borderline, and how his sister commented they should let his brother play (they already did on the first quarter!). And his girlfriend who said something like "I'm not used to seeing (lame) games like this.", as if to say her boyfriend always played a good game. And that teammate even commented earlier on the game how the other team was not a challenge, well he took those words back later on. 

Another teammate of my boyfriend had his whole family watching too. They came a bit later, because like a said, the game was schedules at 8PM  His father mentioned how his little sister insisted they come because she needs to watch her big brother's game. That was too cute. And this teammate got hit by a player from the other team and he was heating up on the bench saying how rude the other player was and that he will get him back, but his mother answered so kindly that her son should let it go and that it is all part of the game, things like these are part of the game's territory. The mother of the other teammate who left was dressed all classy, but when she talked, she sounded like someone at the dirty market; and compared to this mother dressed so simply, with such good advice, the other mother was a shame. 

Monday, boyfriend's basketball practice, I learned that even a few seconds can make a difference. As a bystander, I was also helpful by being called to be the timer. Once there was only 15-20 seconds left in the game and they called for a substitution, I thought it was useless with only a few second left, but they were able to score. I there I learned that even a few seconds, really does make a difference. 

I enjoyed watching my boyfriend and his team practice and play. One can really see though that they lack the sense of togetherness and they are a bit awkward as a team, but hopefully their practices polish that off and they play a better game next Sunday. 

I wish I knew and understood how to play basketball, it looks like a lot of fun, plus it is always nice to feel like part of the team. And my boyfriend and his 3-point shots: HOT. :)

My Christian Life and Bible Study

I became a Christian back when I was in 5th grade, and it is always a sweet and comforting thing to remember, that I am saved. 

I have been active in youth fellowships since then up to high school, or at the very least, I have been attending youth fellowships. I have joined my brothers and sisters in Christ in activities that are refreshing to the soul, to name a few: outreach and feeding programs, fund raising, garage sales, summer camps, summer bible study volunteering as assistant teacher, mall evangelism, and etc. 

When I reached college, it was harder to fit in the schedule and it took more effort that I apparently was not able to give. Also, I had to fetch my mom from work which added to the conflict in time. All in all, I was out of it and before I was even aware of it, I was backsliding. 

Being a Christian does not mean you are perfect and better than other people who are yet to be saved, sometimes some Christians even have it bad. A few of us carry a burden to live up to people's standards of what a Christian should be, and on top of that we have to live up to what we think a Christian should be, and what we think we should be for our Lord. It is a daily struggle, for some if not for all. It is like how some people describe love as a daily decision, you decide to love and keep loving. As Christians, it is a constant decision to walk in the right path and to aim heavenward. Our human nature and flaws of course are given obstacles, but then again obstacles are there to be conquered. 

After college or finishing up college rather, we went to the states and I remember thinking "finally! a chance to find a fellowship group and grow again!", but that of course did not happen as I got too preoccupied with adjusting and with work. All just excuses really. 

Last week, I attended a fellowship my friend from my old fellowship goes to. We grew up as Christian brothers and sisters. I actually blew off the first two or three time of going, either I was too late or I was not able to wake up. Last week I even ran late, but I just went and got over with going there for the first time. It was a nice familiar feeling, and yet new and refreshing at the same time. Different church, different crowd, yet within an hour or so, I poured out to them a heavy burden about me, my personal life, and my family. A bunch of strangers really and I dropped a personal burden, but then again, we are siblings in Christ, and that was very comforting. I even really looked forward to this Thursday. 

Earlier today after work, I went to the gym and trained, also tried boxing for the first time and did basic footwork movements and jab - speed punches. I tired myself enough to have a good sleep with the four hours I had, and I prayed that I be able to wake up for bible study. And thankfully I did. It was very easy for me to just turn off the alarm and doze off again, but I thank God for the hunger for His word that I felt, that I stood up and got ready.

Meat of the matter: Earlier we read and discussed Matthew 6: 5-15.

Matthew 6: 5-8 "[5] And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men. I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full. [6] But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. [7] And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. [8] Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him."

What we discussed and got out of the reading:

Verse 5: Pastor said that actors before we referred to or called as hypocrites. So in the verse it is like these people are just acting, praying beautifully in front of the people to impress and show off, but behind it all lacks intimacy and sincerity, and the real connection to God. These people have received their reward which are praises and adoration from others with comments like "he/she is such a good Christian", "he/she is so religious  and spiritual", and etc. They pray in front of people and put up a facade of being so holy, but behind it there is no heart and sincerity. All just for show. 

Verse 6: It does not literally mean go into your room and pray in secret, because it does not matter where you are. What this verse is trying to say is have the heart when you pray, and pray to pray and not to impress people. The Father sees what is truly in our hearts and we will be rewarded accordingly.  

Verse 7: This would refer to a few of us Christians who tend to pray with flowery words to again, impress people. We sometimes beat around the bush before getting to the point of what we are really praying for and we tend to use big words just to impress people with our wide vocabulary. Babbling, saying words and not really meaning them.

Verse 8: Our Father knows what we need even before we ask Him. He knows what is in our hearts. All the acting and praying for show is useless because God sees our true intentions and sees what is in our hearts. We cannot hide from Him. 

• When we pray, God sees our intention. When we pray, we should make sure and maybe question our intentions.
• Flowery words are not necessary, it is best to states and declare clearly what we are praying for.
• We should be mindful of our prayers, and be as theologically correct or in line with the bible as possible, not like i.e. "Thank you for dying on the cross for us oh Father" - It was Jesus, the Son who died for our since, not the Father. 
• Make sure your prayers are correct and do not just pray for the sake of praying, i.e. praying over a fast-food meal to nourish your body, instead pray that it will satisfy your hunger - that would be better.
• Praying with intimacy, the heart, and sincerity. God sees your heart. Pray not out of routine, pray with heart.

These were the few highlights of our group discussion. I finished bible study feeling refreshed. And already I am excited for next week Thursday! I worry though when I leave for the states that I backslide again. It is a constant battle to keep on growing. I once heard our pastor before say that if you are not growing and not moving forward, you are moving backward and backsliding. 

Again in this session of bible study, I poured in a little heart and told them how it was, backsliding and all. It was as if God had a pager, and I was sending Him messages and He was receiving it. I keep talking and talking without listening to Him, to His words. And even in those times I am unfaithful, I know, truly know that He is faithful and He never left me. I still felt His blessing in my life even when I stopped reading my bible and stopped communicating with Him, if not to ask and ask some more. But He never left me, He was constantly giving me love and blessing. And as I was professing this, I felt I was close to tears. My God is an awesome God. 

PS: Noj also gave me my Starbucks planner today. Yey! Now to continue collecting stickers for my sister's planner.

PSS: Congratulations to all board passer! Hello Engineers! :) God is good.

Where do I go from here?

I have friends pursuing careers, batch mates getting married or engaged, and a few venturing into their own businesses. What about me? 

A lot of people have wondered why I am here when I can be in the states. Some people think it's silly how a few do anything just so they can get out of here and yet here I am, willing and on my own choosing to stay. People assume that I am here for my boyfriend, I partly am and I will be lying if I deny it, but I have a deeper reason as well. I am here because, as I have mentioned before, I want a taste of independence. 

I could have stayed in New York when we visited last December, or could have moved to Minnesota with my uncle and grandmother (okay, maybe not), or maybe stayed in California with relatives. I did not and do not like Seattle as much as I am supposed to and I also wanted to try and get away from my family. I love my family dearly, but I feel as though I need to be away to feel independent and to feel the way a twenty something year old person should feel. 

My parents said if I wanted to live in a different state, they would rather have me be back here, at home- where we have a house, a car, and a house help. Basically, I am all set-up here as oppose to staying at a different state. Plus, this place is more predictable to us, being as we have lived here for most of our lives. But as I am here, I honestly do not feel as independent as I expected to feel. Sure I pay for my gas, my eat-outs, my movies, my "shopping", and all else, but my father still pays for electricity, water, and food at home. And even with that I am not able to save as much as I should have. Gas is burning up my wallet really, and plus my wanting to not stay home at an empty house is adding to my expenses as well. 

I signed up at Citigym, and that has been keeping me occupied for the past few weeks. It is where I spend my times alone when boyfriend is working. I have been attending yoga, cardio kickboxing, and zumba classes. I am enjoying yoga more than expected. My month at the gym is almost up and I will be leaving for the holidays soon. 

So now, the question and crossroads I am face with: Where do I go from here? When I go to the states for the holidays, a lot of people are expecting me not to come back. I do not want to either if I find a good and stable job while I am in the US but I want to come back to formally end things with the company, if ever. But honestly, I really do not like my job. The company is fine, it is the job I cannot stand. It is a very easy "technical support engineer" job that makes me feel useless and unimportant to the company. In my resume, I wrote under objective: "To secure a position in a reliable company where I will be able to utilize my organizational skills, improve my competency in the array of skills I currently possess, and to have the privilege of learning and growing as a professional individual. And to be a valued and effective employee, able to deliver and excel in what is asked for." But I do not feel like I am growing here. A lot of idle time, sure I can use to learn to code if I really wanted to, but in the wee hours I am working in it is just harder. Makes me wonder if I really want to code. I believe if you really want something, you find a way to get it and use all means available to you. Coding just does not come as naturally to me. It can get frustrating, it has been frustrating. 

So for the third time, as I keep derailing my thoughts from the subject at hand: Where do I go from here? I can stay in the US, find a stable job, and petition Elwin. I can come back, continue until I reach one year and ask to be transferred to the California office and if not quit, or I can try something else like a different career path. All these possibilities and more have been playing in my mind. I was thinking of pursuing something in the advertising department, administrative department, and even going back to school for a master's degree or a different course? Then again, there is the matter of money. I will just pray God's will be made clear to me and that I will be walking on the path He chose for me. 

I am blessed I have all these options available to me, but it is currently giving me a headache. I do not know what to choose and what to do. Uncertainty is always frustrating, all the more at this point in my life because what I choose could be or is a defining moment. I guess I thought venting it all out on here would help. I think it did, I hope it did. 

Yoga and Problems

Today I tried Yoga. 

Never, before yesterday, did I imagine myself trying out Yoga. I thought it was just one of those things people do out of fad, like drinking Milk Tea. At one point, I honestly even thought it was a joke. Well, Yoga punished me for thinking such things. 

After a meeting with Jaye, we went and joined a Yoga class at CitiGym. I never really bothered much about Yoga, did not Google it or anything, my interest about it was close to zero. I thought the session would include meditating, deep breathing, channeling my inner Chi, and the like (easy and light stuff). Although we did a few of those, sort of, we did more! I did not expect to sweat in a Yoga session, or feel my muscles burn. For a beginner like me, I could say that was almost intense. We did "Flow Yoga", and no, I do not have an idea what that was. I did like the stretching, and I am hopeful I may shape up some abs through Yoga too. Wow. My whole idea of Yoga totally changed. It was challenging! 

I met up with Jaye at around 1PM at CitiGym. I enrolled myself prior to her arrival. I am quite impressed with the environment, facility, and staff. I paid 1350php and got my picture ID on the same day. Compared to the 1500php I paid for a month of membership at MetroSports with no card or feel of exclusivity, this was a sweet deal. MetroSports was a sad buy and one I regret, I only went there three or four times and on top of that, hit the cement post during one of my rainy day visits. My membership at CitiGym includes all the classes I wish to attend, i.e.: Yoga, Hip-Hop, Kickboxing, Strip Tease, and etc. Also, personal lockers during the duration of your visit; lockers with convenient lock systems and keys which you can wear around the wrist like a watch, hassle-free. We are provided small and big towels, plastic cups and water, we can use a proper shower with soap dispenser in it, and the sauna (I am yet to try!).

My Picture ID

Mindful Menu Movement

(Class list and schedules)

I wish I found out about this gym sooner! You have to admit, the place where it is located at: Waterfront Hotel, makes it intimidating. One can easily assume a very steep price for their membership packages. I do not know for how long they will have this 1350php/ month membership, I do know they offer it for all those 23 yrs or younger.

Also, one thing I notice even more now about myself is that I am a bit socially awkward and self-conscious. (Maybe I thought those through in Yoga session? Not sure.) I admire how some people go to gyms (or other places) so easily on their own, doing their thing and not caring how they look to others. I want that. I would dare have it if I did not know anyone at the gym. I badly wished I did not know anyone there, but just from the first visit alone, I spotted 4 people I know and said hi to, and 3 people whose faces I know because they were my schoolmate. Plus, 1 more person confirmed who goes to that gym and another whom I am not in good terms with. Now that I have pointed out these problems, I pray the Lord helps me face them and correct them. I am only hoping however, that I will not be running into those familiar faces, or any more familiar faces, and especially those I'm not in good terms with. Since I am new, it will take some time to adjust, place myself, and be comfortable moving about the gym alone. I also did not have rubber shoes, so Yoga was the only option. My rubber shoes are old and have served their time, and there is one I can use but needs washing. 

I hope, unlike the 1500php I spent on MetroSports, that I will be able to make full use of my money's worth this time, stop being socially awkward, and stop being so self-conscious. Why am I so awkward with meeting familiar faces and friends in unplanned situations? Something is wrong, and it is only now I am really concerned.  

End Goal: to have a fit body and the abs I have always wanted to have or flat belly at the very least :) It is a long shot, but maybe if I overcome my problems (which is also an end goal) I can attain it. 

I love the feeling of sweating because you are actually doing something, as opposed to sweating due to hot weather.

PS: It seems I am not alone with wanting to go to a gym wherein I do not know any familiar faces. Noj apparently, prefers the same because he is embarrassed as well.

PSS: For the most time at the gym, we spent it on Internet and food! We went to McDo I.T. Park to eat around 3PM. :)